Life is a Lotto
A physically challenged man has won 3.2 Million shillings in the Lotto. He repairs appliances in a roadside Kiosk in Siaya. He has six kids. Christmas isnāt going to be the same. Actually, life isnāt. There is a little fact that he participated in the draw using his wifeās phone. Who said Lady Luck isnāt a woman?
We asked Joe Black, back in Kituiās majengo what he thinks of luck and fate and stuff.
By Joe Black, Resident Troublemaker
I am not a big believer in luck, or the universeās benevolence. Iām not one your take-a-dip-into-the-ocean-the-tide-will-wash-you-to-a-deserted -island type of people. If you jump into the ocean, youāll just plain old snuff it. The sea wonāt be swayed by your Italian loafers, or your upcoming Dubai vacation. And if you do happen to be washed to the deserted island, youāll most definitely not invent a boat that runs on coconut oil.
The damning truth about the universe is that it doesnāt like you.
But sometimes, as life is wont to do, Iāve had this theory challenged. Something so amazing, so out of place, so false-sounding happens and there are no other reasonable explanations.Ā Luck, fate, will of God. Depending on how you look at it, these three surpass and overlap each other at every instance. And it all alludes to the universeās benevolence. That thereās something out there, beyond our comprehension, running the cogs of our lives, paddling our boats and watching out for the rocks – a lighthouse, a guide, God.
Let me get to my point before you start thinking Iām some deep, philosophical chap who says stuff like ā itās an old car born newā who, to ward western influence, puts on akala and designs his own clothes that mostly look like dresses, spotted African print sacks. Iāll be twenty soon-Ā 5ā9, goatee, responsibility, confusion and then some more. Itās a bumpy transition. I see it well with my friends, especially ones I went to school with. Most are now in campus and whenever I bump into one of them, in their khakis and long sleeved shirts, they always start most of the sentences with ālife in campo isā¦ā and their stories are about this weekend planĀ they have with their new campo chicks and friends youād think it snows food and rains drink. Itās as if they feel your life is some dreary dark cave that must be lit by their campo anecdotes. And woe unto you if you donāt know what they mean by 1.2 because 1.2 canāt be just any other number, it canāt be a reading of the Richter scale, it canāt be Germanyās fertility rate, or whatās left of the Eurobond. It has to be the first year, second semester.
The story of Cleopas Were is one such instance. When you undergo such a radical paradigm shift you disbelieve all the tenets you once held on. Mr Wereās biography is, well, brief. A family man from Siaya in his late forties, working from a stall where he fixes broken appliances, disabled, living with six children. Here is the clincher: heās Lottoās biggest winner, having recently won; wait for it, a whooping 3.2 million so that radically changes the dynamics because no millionaireās biography falls under brief is there?
I donāt know about you, donāt if you handle mega accounts bursting at the seams and thus 3.2 milli to you is pocket change. With 3.2 milli, Iād make a carpet entirely out of currencyĀ For shits and giggles, Iāll even officially change my name to Jose Negron so as to give the eye to the idiots whoāll wonder why on both hell and earth I have a Spanish name and an earthenware complexion; wouldnāt it make sense to abide by Tom Osanjoās suggestion- Joe Ratieng?
Admittedly, Iāve been thinking a lot about Cleo. I mean, what are the odds? Did the rules of luck bend a little toward him because, I mean, many of these lotteries are won by people who are not in dire need of cash, people to whom it be of a gift and will most likely be splurged on superficial, nouveau riche needs like Russian strippers, or the SGR.
Iāve been thinking what he will do with the money. Iām still thinking about it.
Here is how to get involved with the Lotto. I’m told there is aĀ 100 million Jackpot this Wednesday.
To Play via MPESAĀ
Choose theĀ Lipa na M-PESAĀ option from the MPESA menu and send at leastĀ KSh 50Ā to PayBill Business NumberĀ 777000, with account numberĀ SHINDAĀ to receive your lucky numbers.
To play ONLINEĀ
Go toĀ www.mylotto.co.ke/shindaĀ register and pick you numbers