I finally got to convince my very stubborn self that I needed to go to the gym. Not to watch people exercise and marvel at the equipment in the gym then lie to the instructor that I will be back the following day after being scared by all the sweat and funny noises from people working out.
I had it all planned in my head: Arrive at the gym, say hi to the instructor, make use of all the machines are available and later show the aerobics class what being serious really means. All I managed to do right was arrive at the gym and say hi to the instructor. Somewhere in the back of my head, the gym is meant for big people. In all honesty if I was small, I am sure I would never step in the gym. I would be out there sampling all the pizzas and ice cream available and leave the sweating to the people who need to. Probably explains my current predicament, but my ‘if it is not broken do not fix it’ remains strong. The gym is right in my hood. It has been there for a while only that my attitude towards gyms had prevented me from visiting it.
When I got at the door, I kept pushing the door and it could not open only for one of the attendants to swipe a card at the door and viola! The door opened. The first thing that came into my mind was that this gym had witnessed many like me, who would come to just look around and promise to come back the following day, hence they had devised a way of making everyone, including those who think running on the treadmill for five minutes is a proper workout, stay until all the unwanted calories had been shed. I was very determined to work out so that did not scare me one bit. I made a mental note to ask them later if they could add a second door to discourage all the jokers.
Being a very curious being, I decided to first take a tour of the place before starting my planned 5 hours nonstop work out. At the reception, I was advised to start on my left. I turned and when I got there, I realized it was like the women section of the gym. There was a treadmill which nobody was using, one lady was on the bicycle but she was on her phone chatting and once in a while taking selfies. Most of the ladies in the room were lying down on the mats doing sit ups and a few were skipping rope. I am not lying; I was the biggest one of them all in the room. The thought that this is what the gym was going to do to my body, wanted me to cancel the tour and immediately hit the treadmill. Just as I was gaining psyche one of the ladies stood up from the mat and addressed the lady on the bicycle “Just look at my tummy, aki si it has grown big! And I told my husband in the morning that eating the two mandazis was not a good idea.”
The said lady was in a top that allowed you to see the abs. I tried to look for the big stomach but all I could see was a firm stomach; abs and all. I hang my head in shame as I looked at my bulging stomach which could not even be hidden by the baggy t shirt. Does this lady know what it means to have a big tummy? Has she ever tried to tuck in her stomach in her skirt or trouser then hold her breath the whole day to avoid the tucked contents from falling out? Does she know I can kill for such a body?
I kept asking myself these questions in my head over and over again as I stared at her. The other friend stood from the bicycle and turned to show her friend her ass “Don’t talk my dear, just look at my ass, it is becoming too wobbly, I did not know that missing squats for three days was this dangerous.” If it is not for my confidence, I could have sworn that the two were mocking me. These two will commit suicide if I gave them my body, I thought to myself. I left them taking more selfies and went on with my tour.
The right side of the gym had all the machines that I do not know their names and the aerobics room. Naturally, adrenaline was full in the room. Men running on the treadmills, lifting weights, boxing and other things. There were a number of ladies in the room too. Some of the men vitambis made me feel like a super model and I immediately hit the treadmill with all the determination I could gather. Five minutes on the treadmill felt like eternity and the fact that no one else in the room seemed to tire was not helping either. I immediately missed my friends on the left side of the gym. Thirty minutes into trying all the available machines and failing miserably in some, I saw all the ladies going to the aerobics room and I stepped off the bicycle to join them. My friend with abs also was not left behind but before going for aerobics she came to rant to a man, whom I later realized was the husband, about how the mandazis he forced down her throat has made her stomach so big. The man apologized and promised to join her for T25 exercises the whole week.
The aerobics class had awesome music at the beginning as we warmed out, but by the 15th minute, everyone in class had an idea of how to step except Nancy. The instructor yelled some instructions every time I was getting to learn the steps and I was left looking all lost and confused, my determination and I quickly retreated to the back of the class and after ten minutes of looking like I had two left feet, I quietly left the class. I think what made everything worse was the fact that the men could clearly see everything that was going on in the aerobics class and my ego cannot stand anyone thinking that I am a bad dancer. I quietly left the gym and was glad when I found the door open.
I now have more reasons why I am yet and probably will never love the gym. I now fully embrace the walks and occasional morning runs. I should probably run more; I might end up in the Olympics and win more money. I am on the right track though, I cannot complain. I just need something really awesome to make the experience I had at the gym. I am thinking of going out to prove that I can still dance, attend a funny play that will make me laugh and forget everything I know (Ikenia Arts have me covered on that) and find me a good waist trainer.